Chirp - McD's.

Last night, while on my way home from work, I two-wayed my husband. He will be known as 'J' from this point forward.

By two-way, I mean that obnoxious feature that Nextel phones have - the walkie talkie.

I told him I was on my way and asked him if he needed anything.

In the few seconds it takes for him to mash the button and for me to hear the cute chirp, I thought.. Wouldn't it be nice if he said he just needed me? And then I laughed at myself. We've been married for a coon's age. (That's a long fucking time in non-hillbilly speak.) No way was he going to say something sweet like that. Rather, he was going to ask me to stop at McD's for a heart attack, hold the pickles. Super sized.

I hear the chirp. His voice. "I just need someone to hold."

The Kodak moment would have shown me, smiling a sappy, stupid, Hallmark smile.

I reply, "That would be me. I love you too so much."

*insert approximately 45 seconds.*

Chirp. J. - "If you feel like it, you could stop by McD's and get me a double cheeseburger, hold the pickles and a strawberry shake. Get yourself one too, we'll cuddle and drink them."

Who says romance has to end after the honeymoon?